The Modern Naija Husband

What is the modern Naija husband like? My wife asked what I thought and I responded with just one characteristic.

  1. He likes to eat?

Seeing the look on my wife’s face, I could tell I got it wrong. So I asked my wife what she thought the list should be, and a few hours later, this is the list she gave.

  1. He should be a sexual god who is sensitive to his wife’s needs.
  2. He should be physically fit and good looking…but not a ladies man. Ideally, he should be completely unaware of his own good looks. So perhaps he should be blind (or have bad eyesight) and shy. Or just incredibly naive (until of course he meets his wife)
  3. He should be rich…yet humble. The next budding Bill Gates or Mark Zuckerberg, but should look like Tyson Beckford.
  4. He should be romantic and strong. This usually means he should be familiar with candles, and occasionally place them around the bed without setting the room on fire. He should be able to lift that bed as well.
  5. He should have the memory of an elephant. Never forgetting a single anniversary, special occasion or event. He should memorize all his wife’s clothing so that the day she wears something new, he can immediately compliment her on her lovely outfit.
  6. He should pay for the outfit mentioned above.  He should always pay.
  7. He should have no parents. Therefore having no in-laws to torment his wife with.
  8. He should believe his wife is the best cook in the world (on the days when he’s not cooking for her of course)
  9. He should believe his wife is the sexiest woman in the world.
  10. Ah yes, how could we forget. The ever present intelligence.  He should be smart but not so smart that he’s not God-Fearing.  No one knows what that means exactly, but its right up there with “good sense of humor”

So as a rich orphan who is physically fit, able to handle fire, sexual god,  with genius IQ and perfect memory …the ideal Naija husband should be ……….ME (except for the orphan part).

Or this guy below.

The Perfect Naija Husband
The Perfect Naija Husband is actually a Super Hero

What is missing on this list? Leave a comment and let the wife know.


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Comments

40 responses to “The Modern Naija Husband”

  1. Olori Avatar

    LOL. So hilarious. No. 7 is a lil harsh tho. In-laws are not always meanies. I love boo-boo’s mom n dad.

    1. naijahusband Avatar

      Agreed! Her parents are wonderful . I keep telling her. But she never says the same for mine….

  2. livelytwist Avatar

    Lol@ “…he should be familiar with candles, and occasionally place them around the bed without setting the room on fire.” 🙂

    What I don’t get is why he should be able to lift that bed as well? Enlighten me please!

    1. naijahusband Avatar

      Lifting the bed is….hmmm. Another blog post on that one!

      1. livelytwist Avatar

        okay, I’m waiting. I’m curious 🙂

  3. HoneyDame Avatar

    Of course, here is the “offending” article….LOL.
    He should also be an only child…We dont want no dependents! Taaaa!

  4. 1 + The One Avatar

    LOL @ HoneyDame..
    As for the modern Naija husband, errr.. thanks but no thanks lol

  5. chocoholicgirl1 Avatar

    He should have the charm and class of James Bond 😀 …. without the womanising side 😉

  6. adukemi Avatar

    Hahahaha yes!!! I agree with all Lol

  7. Relentless Builder (@RelentlessBldr) Avatar

    He should want to spend every waking hour (outside work, of course) with his wife. And as an alternative to # 7, if the in-laws are alive, he should always pick his wife’s side. ALWAYS.

    1. Naija Husband Avatar

      So far so good. I’m clearly winning in all aspects

  8. Uduak Avatar
    Uduak

    Taking his wife out for relaxing evenings so she doesnt have to cook every blessed day is part of it.

  9. Enkay (@Penkay) Avatar

    He should be very good with a broom and mop! Every wife would love a husband who can help with house chores. Lol!

    1. worshipandswag Avatar

      Okay I chuckled on this one. A big amen to this one, my sister! All sexy and no housekeeping skills is a no to me. LMBO! 😀

  10. Shady Avatar
    Shady

    U left d part dat he must be able 2 change d baby’s diaper and sing lullabies when d time comes

  11. babs Avatar
    babs

    i really enjoy all this talks about a man doing all these wonderful and seemingly impossible things for his wife, i will however like to see or read stuffs about what a wife too should do for the husband cos i am of the opinion that men too are human and have feelings and expectations too. unless someone will tell me that doesn’t matter.

  12. tailogbenjo Avatar

    very funny… read this to my husband

  13. immortalteddybear Avatar

    So your wife basically wants Bruce Wayne aka Batman 😐

  14. Sewuese Avatar
    Sewuese

    Hahahahahah!!!!!!

  15. Babsey Avatar
    Babsey

    I’m sorry, “he should pay for everything?”. Are we in the 19th century? Any modern marriage should respect gender equality

    1. NaijaHusband Avatar

      Check out our “Chop My Money” posts

  16. Queenshady Avatar
    Queenshady

    Gbam on the gender equality

  17. […] I resolve to always believe my wife is the sexiest woman in the world….no matter how many hair nets she wears or how many chicken bones she […]

  18. Tomi Avatar
    Tomi

    Hahaha…. Hilarious…. Hehe… Nice one

  19. Harry Itie Avatar

    This is my fave blog! I love it!!!

  20. Ese Avatar
    Ese

    i just discovered this blog today and its awesome, i have been laughing to the point where tears are coming out of my eyes. . NH and NW, you ‘are both awesome, you have a forever reader of your blog right here!

    1. Morolawun Avatar
      Morolawun

      I second that!!! 😛

      1. NaijaHusband Avatar

        Welcome to the both of you!

  21. Mutale Avatar
    Mutale

    You’re such an awesome match. I like you (NW & NH) plenty. May God bless your marriage with more blissful years 😉

  22. Ebere Avatar
    Ebere

    Just recently discovered this blog..you made my day..I’m practically pissing myself with laughter..2 and 4 is the bomb…lmao..

  23. luckycharm Avatar
    luckycharm

    Lmaoooo…nice one

  24. Timiebix Avatar

    So I have taken it upon myself to read all the posts on here before you and NW come back from your break! And I promise to comment often, so help me God! 🙂

    Meanwhile this list odikwa great sontin!

  25. dr presh Avatar
    dr presh

    Nawa oooo. Just found this blog via Dr N.musings recommendation and iv been laughing. NH and NW u should thank God for finding yourselves-funny duo. Enjoying this

  26. Tessy Avatar
    Tessy

    This is hilarious. I have to share this on twitter!

  27. zinzin Avatar
    zinzin

    Your blog is just crazy..I love your creativity and ability to think outside the box.Good luck to you

  28. bola Avatar
    bola

    my sister has been talking about this blog for months….but i cared less….i decided to open the blog today and gosh…..im loving it…..love the creativity and sense of humor (VERY KEY)…..God bless your union NH & NW……

  29. Dez Avatar
    Dez

    Ok,I thought to myself, ‘I love this blog…I couldn’t possibly love it any more than I already do’; but then I read this post and I fell in love with this blog all over again. Way to go,NH and NW!

  30. nafisah Avatar

    Lol…u r very funny!!!! I should show this to Mr right when I find him.

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